As Catholics, we are called to prayer, penance and alms giving during the season of Lent. As a family, we have chosen to give up pop, as a sacrifice of one of our luxuries. We will donate the dollar amount we would have spent on pop to a charity designated to bring food to under-privileged children sponsored by our local youth.
The length of the sacrifice came up in discussion at the dinner table. Our oldest son was told he only needed to abstain from pop Monday through Saturday, and Sundays are free days. Technically speaking, he is correct. The season of Lent will have 40 days, not counting Sundays.
Personally, I don't feel I can get the true feeling of the 40 days of sacrifice if I am only "on" sacrifice for six days and then off for a day, "on" for six, "off" for one. Six days is much more manageable than forty days.
His argument is it is more difficult to repeatedly give up something. You are constantly starting over on your sacrifice rather getting used to the sacrifice and it becoming less of a sacrifice.
I think that boy is going to grow up to be a lawyer.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Friday, February 27, 2009
Jesus, Remember Me
As a family, we are completing a daily Lenten devotional. Each day there is a reflection based on scripture, a prayer and a suggested penance. Some of the penances are harder than they appear at first blush. Ash Wednesday's penance seemed to be very easy at first glance. The suggested penance was to pray Jesus' name for 15 minutes.
Honestly, I failed the suggested penance. I cannot sit still long enough to complete 15 minutes of prayer that is confined strictly to His name on very many occasions. Also, I could not quite grasp what I needed to be praying to make sure I was meeting the fifteen minute requirement without just repetitively saying His name, but not actually praying. Once in awhile, I really think too hard instead of just doing.
Tonight, though, we had our first Lenten Stations of the Cross. At the very end, Father closed with singing "Jesus, remember me when you go into your kingdom." The tune is stuck in my head, but I think this is my hint to complete my fifteen minutes of penance. By singing that verse, I will be able to concentrate where I need my mind to be, while still meeting the parameters of the penance. I will be three days late, but it will be done.
Honestly, I failed the suggested penance. I cannot sit still long enough to complete 15 minutes of prayer that is confined strictly to His name on very many occasions. Also, I could not quite grasp what I needed to be praying to make sure I was meeting the fifteen minute requirement without just repetitively saying His name, but not actually praying. Once in awhile, I really think too hard instead of just doing.
Tonight, though, we had our first Lenten Stations of the Cross. At the very end, Father closed with singing "Jesus, remember me when you go into your kingdom." The tune is stuck in my head, but I think this is my hint to complete my fifteen minutes of penance. By singing that verse, I will be able to concentrate where I need my mind to be, while still meeting the parameters of the penance. I will be three days late, but it will be done.
Catholic Radio: Revisited
The weather yesterday was very snowy. This morning, the temperature had dropped to a bitterly cold -10. Because of the weather conditions, school was two hours late this morning.
Shortly after Dave left for work this morning, I got the boys up to start their day. CD complained of a sore throat and headache. I asked him to try to make it through breakfast before he decided if he could handle a day at school or not. He could barely keep his head up, which made it easy to decide to keep him home from school.
After I had his older brother and cousin on the bus, I scheduled a doctor's appointment for him. Since Dave's car pooling partner was driving today, I had the Suburban, with XM radio, for my errands.
CD and I headed to his doctor's appointment, listening to Greg Willits, of the Catholics Next Door. It was a quick drive across town, with more focus on the upcoming appointment than the radio. In all honesty, it was just background noise.
After the appointment, though, with the medical answers in hand, we were more relaxed. It was still the Catholics Next Door. Greg Willits, and his guest host, were discussing the current political climate in the United States. Specifically, they spoke of how some people view President Obama as an almost god-like figure.
CD, in all seriousness, said, "Are they kidding? President Obama isn't infallible. Only the Pope can be infallible and even he isn't infallible in all things."
This was a pretty pointed reminder of how observant kids are, the amount of information they absorb and their ability to process what they hear and see and form their own opinions about it. I am grateful for Catholic Radio again today, while my son and I are able to have a frank conversation about current events and how our Catholic view point interacts with a more global view.
Shortly after Dave left for work this morning, I got the boys up to start their day. CD complained of a sore throat and headache. I asked him to try to make it through breakfast before he decided if he could handle a day at school or not. He could barely keep his head up, which made it easy to decide to keep him home from school.
After I had his older brother and cousin on the bus, I scheduled a doctor's appointment for him. Since Dave's car pooling partner was driving today, I had the Suburban, with XM radio, for my errands.
CD and I headed to his doctor's appointment, listening to Greg Willits, of the Catholics Next Door. It was a quick drive across town, with more focus on the upcoming appointment than the radio. In all honesty, it was just background noise.
After the appointment, though, with the medical answers in hand, we were more relaxed. It was still the Catholics Next Door. Greg Willits, and his guest host, were discussing the current political climate in the United States. Specifically, they spoke of how some people view President Obama as an almost god-like figure.
CD, in all seriousness, said, "Are they kidding? President Obama isn't infallible. Only the Pope can be infallible and even he isn't infallible in all things."
This was a pretty pointed reminder of how observant kids are, the amount of information they absorb and their ability to process what they hear and see and form their own opinions about it. I am grateful for Catholic Radio again today, while my son and I are able to have a frank conversation about current events and how our Catholic view point interacts with a more global view.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Lenten Menu Planning
Lent is a season of fasting and penance. All Catholics, between the ages of 14 and 59, are obligated to follow a meatless diet as a small measure of penance on Ash Wednesday and all Fridays of Lent. As an omnivore household, meatless meals are a real challenge. I, for one, have a difficult time stepping outside of the box and looking at foods that are not the normal meat and potato meals we eat here.
This noon hour, while listening to my favorite Catholic radio station, I caught a few minutes of a discussion about Lenten meals. It was only a part of the discussion since the weather was poor and the errand was short, but it prompted me to do some more research tonight. The host of the show stated he and his wife were trying new Lenten meals, from a website recommended by other Catholics. I am on the hunt for the website where these meals are listed, and I haven't found them yet.
While I have been searching for the official information, I have stumbled on to a few websites with some wonderful new recipes to try, as well as some old tried and true favorites. I will link a couple of them here. Check out the websites associated with them, too.
Operation Rice Bowl
Catholic Mom
This noon hour, while listening to my favorite Catholic radio station, I caught a few minutes of a discussion about Lenten meals. It was only a part of the discussion since the weather was poor and the errand was short, but it prompted me to do some more research tonight. The host of the show stated he and his wife were trying new Lenten meals, from a website recommended by other Catholics. I am on the hunt for the website where these meals are listed, and I haven't found them yet.
While I have been searching for the official information, I have stumbled on to a few websites with some wonderful new recipes to try, as well as some old tried and true favorites. I will link a couple of them here. Check out the websites associated with them, too.
Operation Rice Bowl
Catholic Mom
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Standing Room Only
Our Area Faith Community consists of three parishes. Our college campus also has a religious center. Today, eight masses were offered in the area. Four of them were this evening, beginning with the 5:15 Mass at Holy Redeemer. Our Church was packed. It was standing room only, all the way to the back of the balcony.
During his homily, Father said Ash Wednesday is the third best attended Mass of the year, following only Christmas and Easter. It is the start of the Lenten season. It is the beginning of the path we will follow to grow in our relationship with our Lord and Savior.
The packed Church is a sign of hope. Hundreds of people heard the message of the homily tonight. Hundreds of people witnessed their faith in action in those around them. Hundreds of people started their Lenten journey tonight, together. I pray we will continue this journey together so the Church is just as full when Easter has come and gone as it was tonight.
During his homily, Father said Ash Wednesday is the third best attended Mass of the year, following only Christmas and Easter. It is the start of the Lenten season. It is the beginning of the path we will follow to grow in our relationship with our Lord and Savior.
The packed Church is a sign of hope. Hundreds of people heard the message of the homily tonight. Hundreds of people witnessed their faith in action in those around them. Hundreds of people started their Lenten journey tonight, together. I pray we will continue this journey together so the Church is just as full when Easter has come and gone as it was tonight.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Helicopter Prayers
Emergencies happen every day to people of all walks of life. It could be a choking incident, car accident, severe allergic reaction, seizures or one of a whole host of problems. Prompt responses can be the difference between life and death.
We are in the middle of the flight path connecting the hospital in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, with our local hospital. Any time they need to airlift a patient and send him or her west, the helicopter will begin its descent shortly before it passes over our home. When the boys were small, they were always excited to see the helicopters flying over. We would go out on the driveway and look up to watch the helicopter fly in. Then we would come back out and watch when the helicopter flew back out. We would discuss the color of the chopper, the call sign painted on its body and the parts of the machine we could identify. We never discussed why the helicopter was coming in or who might be on it as it left.
A good friend of mine told us the story of her daughter's illness. One Sunday, her daughter became extremely ill. She ran a high fever and seizured. Before long, arrangements were made to airlift her to a larger hospital in the metro area. Her parents started out by car. They prayed the rosary over and over.
I cannot imagine the feeling of fear, of loss of control, of uncertainty while they made that drive. She said from then on she always prayed a simple series of prayers when she heard the sirens or saw the flashing strobe lights of rescue vehicles. Since then, when we see a helicopter flying over, we pray an Our Father, a Hail Mary and a Glory Be for all those involved in whatever incident has caused them to come together at this time and this place. We pray for the person who is injured, for their family and friends, and for the pilot and the flight crew, who never set out that morning with the hope or desire to experience a helicopter ride up close and personal
Tonight, we watched the helicopter touch lightly down on the tarmac near the emergency department. Together, Dave and I prayed for the person who would be leaving the warm security of our small town to fly out to Sioux Falls and all those who were aiding in the person's care.
Lord, please be with those who need you most, especially those who needed additional medical assistance today. In Jesus name we pray, Amen.
We are in the middle of the flight path connecting the hospital in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, with our local hospital. Any time they need to airlift a patient and send him or her west, the helicopter will begin its descent shortly before it passes over our home. When the boys were small, they were always excited to see the helicopters flying over. We would go out on the driveway and look up to watch the helicopter fly in. Then we would come back out and watch when the helicopter flew back out. We would discuss the color of the chopper, the call sign painted on its body and the parts of the machine we could identify. We never discussed why the helicopter was coming in or who might be on it as it left.
A good friend of mine told us the story of her daughter's illness. One Sunday, her daughter became extremely ill. She ran a high fever and seizured. Before long, arrangements were made to airlift her to a larger hospital in the metro area. Her parents started out by car. They prayed the rosary over and over.
I cannot imagine the feeling of fear, of loss of control, of uncertainty while they made that drive. She said from then on she always prayed a simple series of prayers when she heard the sirens or saw the flashing strobe lights of rescue vehicles. Since then, when we see a helicopter flying over, we pray an Our Father, a Hail Mary and a Glory Be for all those involved in whatever incident has caused them to come together at this time and this place. We pray for the person who is injured, for their family and friends, and for the pilot and the flight crew, who never set out that morning with the hope or desire to experience a helicopter ride up close and personal
Tonight, we watched the helicopter touch lightly down on the tarmac near the emergency department. Together, Dave and I prayed for the person who would be leaving the warm security of our small town to fly out to Sioux Falls and all those who were aiding in the person's care.
Lord, please be with those who need you most, especially those who needed additional medical assistance today. In Jesus name we pray, Amen.
Catholic Radio
We have two sons, ages 12 and 11. One of the challenges of listening to the radio, is screening the material to be family oriented. Some of the songs, even my beloved country, are not appropriate for young listeners. If the boys hear a song come on and want the station changed because of the content, it obviously makes them uncomfortable and they should not have been exposed to it. I was surprised at how observant they were with the lyrics of the songs. Unfortunately, I learned the hard way while listening to one of my favorite cds. That was an embarrassing moment, listening to them yell "Change it" and "Turn it off!" and realizing it was mine, not just something we stumbled on while listening to the radio.
As they have gotten older, it is easier to listen to the radio. If the subject matter is not the most appropriate, it gives us a discussion topic. We have had some very interesting talks in the ten minute drive from school to home based on song lyrics.
Lately, however, we haven't had those types of discussions. Sirius and XM Satellite Radio joined each other sometime this past winter. Our Surburban had XM, but XM did not have a Catholic based station that we had ever discovered. With the joining of the two satellite radio providers, we gained the Catholic Channel (XM 117). Greg and Jennifer Willits were personalities I had followed on my Ipod, through their podcast "Rosary Army". Now, they host "The Catholics Next Door." They are people like us, living lives like ours, with children like we have children. I enjoy my fifteen spurts of their show in the morning on the days I have to run errands.
If I have afternoon errands instead, I get to listen to "The Catholic Guy with Lino Rulli." He has a more informal approach to his show, which I will admit was a bit hard for me to get used to in the beginning. Now, however, I will say I enjoy listening to the banter between the personalities, especially on Thursday and Friday afternoons when they have their priest guests.
With Dave's new job, he is now carpooling. His little Grand Am is not as comfortable as my Suburban, so on his weeks to drive, he leaves the Grand Am for me and takes my vehicle. The Grand Am is ten years old and has a regular radio. Today, I realized how much I miss it on the weeks he drives. I hopped in the car to take our youngest to school and I was listening to local news radio. Because of the time of day, I couldn't find anything but news. There were no Willits. Then, this afternoon I had to go to the bank. I hopped back in the car and there was no Lino.
Before today, I hadn't realized how much I looked forward to the brief tidbits of time where I could hear another Catholic perspective on life. There have been times where I have rolled my eyes and times where I almost cried, but there has never been a time listening to Catholic Radio when I did not have to think about what I was hearing. I am thankful for the merger, thankful we are able to have XM Radio, and thankful for the people of the Catholic Channel, from the people who share their talent on air to everyone who makes it possible for it to be heard. I only wish we would have had it sooner. If we had, maybe we would not have had to discover how inappropriate my music choices have been.
As they have gotten older, it is easier to listen to the radio. If the subject matter is not the most appropriate, it gives us a discussion topic. We have had some very interesting talks in the ten minute drive from school to home based on song lyrics.
Lately, however, we haven't had those types of discussions. Sirius and XM Satellite Radio joined each other sometime this past winter. Our Surburban had XM, but XM did not have a Catholic based station that we had ever discovered. With the joining of the two satellite radio providers, we gained the Catholic Channel (XM 117). Greg and Jennifer Willits were personalities I had followed on my Ipod, through their podcast "Rosary Army". Now, they host "The Catholics Next Door." They are people like us, living lives like ours, with children like we have children. I enjoy my fifteen spurts of their show in the morning on the days I have to run errands.
If I have afternoon errands instead, I get to listen to "The Catholic Guy with Lino Rulli." He has a more informal approach to his show, which I will admit was a bit hard for me to get used to in the beginning. Now, however, I will say I enjoy listening to the banter between the personalities, especially on Thursday and Friday afternoons when they have their priest guests.
With Dave's new job, he is now carpooling. His little Grand Am is not as comfortable as my Suburban, so on his weeks to drive, he leaves the Grand Am for me and takes my vehicle. The Grand Am is ten years old and has a regular radio. Today, I realized how much I miss it on the weeks he drives. I hopped in the car to take our youngest to school and I was listening to local news radio. Because of the time of day, I couldn't find anything but news. There were no Willits. Then, this afternoon I had to go to the bank. I hopped back in the car and there was no Lino.
Before today, I hadn't realized how much I looked forward to the brief tidbits of time where I could hear another Catholic perspective on life. There have been times where I have rolled my eyes and times where I almost cried, but there has never been a time listening to Catholic Radio when I did not have to think about what I was hearing. I am thankful for the merger, thankful we are able to have XM Radio, and thankful for the people of the Catholic Channel, from the people who share their talent on air to everyone who makes it possible for it to be heard. I only wish we would have had it sooner. If we had, maybe we would not have had to discover how inappropriate my music choices have been.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Daily Devotional Readings
Daily devotional reading is an area where I struggle greatly. I feel devotional readings are important. However, I can't quite seem to find something I feel truly comfortable with on a daily basis. To me, daily devotional readings are a way to center myself, as I start my day, with the appropriate mind set. They are an opportunity to learn about my faith, a chance to explore thoughts I haven't considered before or a way for me to speak with God in a way I wouldn't have without the devotional.
I currently use two "Saint of the Day" texts, but have stepped back from the other devotionals I have used in the past. I will be beginning a Lenten devotional in a few days.
If anyone has any recommendations of good devotional material, either in print or online, please let me know. I am in the market for some new sources :)
I currently use two "Saint of the Day" texts, but have stepped back from the other devotionals I have used in the past. I will be beginning a Lenten devotional in a few days.
If anyone has any recommendations of good devotional material, either in print or online, please let me know. I am in the market for some new sources :)
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Holy Water Fonts
Dave was raised as a Lutheran. His mother was Lutheran. His mother's parents had been Lutheran. He came from a strong family tradition. His father was not Lutheran, though. His father was Catholic, a man raised by a woman with an extremely strong Catholic faith.
His father was the oldest son. When his grandmother passed away, many of her personal effects were passed on to Dave's father. The box contained personal papers, a crucifix and something we could not quite identify. It was porcelain. A angel figure was at the top. The bottom was a small basin. It looked like there were hard water deposits in it, but we could not figure out what it was or what it meant.
Dave did some research. He found out it was a holy water font. Based on the design, it was probably one which had been located in a child's room at one time. Traditionally, it would hold holy water for family blessings or blessings of the room where it was. We discussed it and prayed about it, and felt called to place it by our front door. It rested there for several years, getting sporadic use. We had good intentions, but good intentions do not always translate into action.
We had some remodeling done on our home and took down the holy water font to ensure it was not damaged. After the remodeling was completed, the font did not go back up. Time passed by and one day we realized how long it had been since it was in place.
We talked again, and prayed some more. The holy water font from Dave's grandmother's home was put away, for now. It was old and fragile and we were afraid it would be broken. Instead, as a family, we chose a new holy water font for our front door and a holy water font for each of the boys' bedrooms.
The holy water font has a place by our front door again. It is the Holy Family. At the bottom is a slightly larger basin. We fill it with holy water from our Church. Each weekday morning, we have family prayer before we go our separate ways to work and to school. At the end of our prayer, each member of the family receives a blessing with holy water.
The font stays full. Some of us choose to bless ourselves more than just in the morning. Some of us choose to stay with just the one blessing. Some of us make different choices on different days. It is always available, though.
Bringing forward an older tradition has brought our family closer together, both our family living with us and our immediate ancestors. I think of Dave's grandmother. I wonder if she felt with her sons the way I feel with mine as I make the sign of the cross on their foreheads. I wonder if this will be a tradition my children bring to their homes when they grow up. Will they feel like I do when they make the sign of the cross on their children's foreheads?
His father was the oldest son. When his grandmother passed away, many of her personal effects were passed on to Dave's father. The box contained personal papers, a crucifix and something we could not quite identify. It was porcelain. A angel figure was at the top. The bottom was a small basin. It looked like there were hard water deposits in it, but we could not figure out what it was or what it meant.
Dave did some research. He found out it was a holy water font. Based on the design, it was probably one which had been located in a child's room at one time. Traditionally, it would hold holy water for family blessings or blessings of the room where it was. We discussed it and prayed about it, and felt called to place it by our front door. It rested there for several years, getting sporadic use. We had good intentions, but good intentions do not always translate into action.
We had some remodeling done on our home and took down the holy water font to ensure it was not damaged. After the remodeling was completed, the font did not go back up. Time passed by and one day we realized how long it had been since it was in place.
We talked again, and prayed some more. The holy water font from Dave's grandmother's home was put away, for now. It was old and fragile and we were afraid it would be broken. Instead, as a family, we chose a new holy water font for our front door and a holy water font for each of the boys' bedrooms.
The holy water font has a place by our front door again. It is the Holy Family. At the bottom is a slightly larger basin. We fill it with holy water from our Church. Each weekday morning, we have family prayer before we go our separate ways to work and to school. At the end of our prayer, each member of the family receives a blessing with holy water.
The font stays full. Some of us choose to bless ourselves more than just in the morning. Some of us choose to stay with just the one blessing. Some of us make different choices on different days. It is always available, though.
Bringing forward an older tradition has brought our family closer together, both our family living with us and our immediate ancestors. I think of Dave's grandmother. I wonder if she felt with her sons the way I feel with mine as I make the sign of the cross on their foreheads. I wonder if this will be a tradition my children bring to their homes when they grow up. Will they feel like I do when they make the sign of the cross on their children's foreheads?
Saturday, February 21, 2009
The Road to Emmaus
This weekend, Dave and twenty other men from our area are on their Emmaus journey. Based on the scripture from Luke, where the two travelers met Jesus on the Road to Emmaus but only came to know it was Him in the breaking of the bread, it is a two day retreat. Our parish hosts an all female retreat in November and an all male retreat in February.
I made my Emmaus journey three Novembers ago. Since then, I have returned two times as a member of the team facilitating the retreat for new participants. Since I made my Emmaus, I have encouraged Dave to pray about making his. The time has never been right. There were conflicts with the boys' basketball games. He hasn't felt ready and has had inner conflicts about attending. This year, though, everything came together. He physically missed our youngest son's basketball tournament today, but stayed in touch through text messaging and cell phone calls on breaks. Our son was happy to share his accomplishments and loved re-telling his story of the two three point shots he made with a brand new audience. All in all, it was more than fine, and definitely the right place for Dave to be this weekend.
I am not surprised it has worked out this well, though. I firmly believe attending the Emmaus retreat is part of God's plan. There will become a time when the people you need to meet, the faith stories you need to hear, the time you need to take for your own spiritual development will all come together. Then, and only then, will it work out for you to be in attendance. I encourage anyone who has contemplated the need for a spiritual refresher to look into the opportunities presented by Emmaus.
The Emmaus experience has had an awesome, as well as awe-inspiring, impact on our lives. It has openly touched all of us, even the boys. Our oldest son has started his journey of self discovery. He is only twelve, but already is looking forward to the day when he is grown up enough that he, too, can make his Emmaus journey. He looks forward to not only being his father's son, but also his father's Emmaus Brother.
As Dave and his new Emmaus brothers share their journey together this weekend, my prayers for them have been repeated often. Please join me in praying for a successful spiritual weekend for each and every one of them.
Lord, please be with the participants at the Emmaus retreat this weekend. Help them to be open to Your call as well as to recognize Your Son, not only in the breaking of the bread, but in the journey itself. Allow the barriers each man has to come down. Give them peace, understanding and acceptance, in Jesus name we pray.
Lore, please be with the team at the Emmaus retreat this weekend. Let them be Your hands and Your feet. Give them the words they need to share to reach the participants. Allow them to open themselves to the direction You want them to take. Give them peace, patience, and hope, in Jesus name we pray.
Amen.
I made my Emmaus journey three Novembers ago. Since then, I have returned two times as a member of the team facilitating the retreat for new participants. Since I made my Emmaus, I have encouraged Dave to pray about making his. The time has never been right. There were conflicts with the boys' basketball games. He hasn't felt ready and has had inner conflicts about attending. This year, though, everything came together. He physically missed our youngest son's basketball tournament today, but stayed in touch through text messaging and cell phone calls on breaks. Our son was happy to share his accomplishments and loved re-telling his story of the two three point shots he made with a brand new audience. All in all, it was more than fine, and definitely the right place for Dave to be this weekend.
I am not surprised it has worked out this well, though. I firmly believe attending the Emmaus retreat is part of God's plan. There will become a time when the people you need to meet, the faith stories you need to hear, the time you need to take for your own spiritual development will all come together. Then, and only then, will it work out for you to be in attendance. I encourage anyone who has contemplated the need for a spiritual refresher to look into the opportunities presented by Emmaus.
The Emmaus experience has had an awesome, as well as awe-inspiring, impact on our lives. It has openly touched all of us, even the boys. Our oldest son has started his journey of self discovery. He is only twelve, but already is looking forward to the day when he is grown up enough that he, too, can make his Emmaus journey. He looks forward to not only being his father's son, but also his father's Emmaus Brother.
As Dave and his new Emmaus brothers share their journey together this weekend, my prayers for them have been repeated often. Please join me in praying for a successful spiritual weekend for each and every one of them.
Lord, please be with the participants at the Emmaus retreat this weekend. Help them to be open to Your call as well as to recognize Your Son, not only in the breaking of the bread, but in the journey itself. Allow the barriers each man has to come down. Give them peace, understanding and acceptance, in Jesus name we pray.
Lore, please be with the team at the Emmaus retreat this weekend. Let them be Your hands and Your feet. Give them the words they need to share to reach the participants. Allow them to open themselves to the direction You want them to take. Give them peace, patience, and hope, in Jesus name we pray.
Amen.
Reflections on a Catholic Wife
It is hard to believe it has been almost 15 years since Dave and I became engaged one brisk March Minnesota afternoon. I was 19, and a practicing Catholic. He was 24 and a non-practicing Lutheran. Other than planning to marry in a Catholic Church, religion did not really play a role in our life together. We had already been going our own ways for a year and it had all worked out so far. I do not think either of us thought there would be a need for that to change.
A decade and a half will have passed the first week of March. Since the beginning, our lives have gone through phenomenal changes, in ways neither of us ever expected. We have two wonderful sons, both rapidly approaching the teenage years. We have buried both of Dave's parents and all three of his grandparents that were living at the time we were married. We live in the second house we purchased together. We started a business. Dave has gone through two significant job changes. Most surprising, though, considering our feelings when we got engaged, is our entire family are active, involved members of our Catholic Church.
My faith journey, and how our family found its way to unity in the Catholic Church, are for another post. Today is about reflection. I feel such awe when I think of the miracles Jesus Christ has worked in our lives. If we had continued our "seperate but equal" approach to religion, I don't believe we would be where we are today as a family. As long as we had our own religion, which we handled on our own, we never had to have the tough discussions about beliefs. We never challenged each other about why we did what we did or believed what we believed. We didn't discuss how I went to Mass alone or how Dave skipped Church entirely, or how either of those decisions would impact our future children.
It has been five years since we decided to take an active role in the Catholic faith, and to attempt to live our lives as we should as Catholics. It has been four years, at Easter, since Dave completed the RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults) program and entered into full communion with the Catholic Church. It has been three years since our last child received the Sacraments of Reconciliation and Eucharist for the first time. My only regret is it took us so long to get there. However, I believe everything happens for a reason. If we hadn't experienced life outside of the Catholic Church, we never would have been able to appreciate the differences we experience now.
My role in our marriage has changed. For the first ten years we were together, I did my own thing. I made my own decisions, typically without consulting Dave. It started with decisions about Church. It didn't stop there, though. As long as we weren't discussing Mass, we didn't discuss the grocery shopping I would do on the way home. Then, we wouldn't discuss menu planning or cooking, because we didn't need to since I did the grocery shopping. As you can see, the ripple effect started simply by not discussing Church spread throughout our lives. We were not on the same page on anything, especially in the last year before we changed our faith direction.
Today, we discuss everything, sometimes in way more detail than is really necessary. My role has evolved. I now see myself more as part of a married unit and less as just an individual. This does not diminish who I am. I still have my own likes and dislikes, my own preferences, my own successes and my own failings. Instead of thinking of myself first, though, I think of us. It has been a gradual shift. I recognize it more in retrospect than I do in day to day living. I am more than okay with this shift. It has brought me peace. It is an awesome feeling to know I am yoked with someone, pulling together for a common purpose, instead of having to do all of the work on my own. For that person to be Dave, after all these years, still has the ability to give me goosebumps.
In order for us to get here, we were blessed by our parish priest. He gave of his time and of himself, to help us along our path. Through him, we were given a new appreciation for the gifts God gives us through his Sacraments. This blog will give me a chance to prayerfully reflect on those gifts and how I show my appreciation for them.
A decade and a half will have passed the first week of March. Since the beginning, our lives have gone through phenomenal changes, in ways neither of us ever expected. We have two wonderful sons, both rapidly approaching the teenage years. We have buried both of Dave's parents and all three of his grandparents that were living at the time we were married. We live in the second house we purchased together. We started a business. Dave has gone through two significant job changes. Most surprising, though, considering our feelings when we got engaged, is our entire family are active, involved members of our Catholic Church.
My faith journey, and how our family found its way to unity in the Catholic Church, are for another post. Today is about reflection. I feel such awe when I think of the miracles Jesus Christ has worked in our lives. If we had continued our "seperate but equal" approach to religion, I don't believe we would be where we are today as a family. As long as we had our own religion, which we handled on our own, we never had to have the tough discussions about beliefs. We never challenged each other about why we did what we did or believed what we believed. We didn't discuss how I went to Mass alone or how Dave skipped Church entirely, or how either of those decisions would impact our future children.
It has been five years since we decided to take an active role in the Catholic faith, and to attempt to live our lives as we should as Catholics. It has been four years, at Easter, since Dave completed the RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults) program and entered into full communion with the Catholic Church. It has been three years since our last child received the Sacraments of Reconciliation and Eucharist for the first time. My only regret is it took us so long to get there. However, I believe everything happens for a reason. If we hadn't experienced life outside of the Catholic Church, we never would have been able to appreciate the differences we experience now.
My role in our marriage has changed. For the first ten years we were together, I did my own thing. I made my own decisions, typically without consulting Dave. It started with decisions about Church. It didn't stop there, though. As long as we weren't discussing Mass, we didn't discuss the grocery shopping I would do on the way home. Then, we wouldn't discuss menu planning or cooking, because we didn't need to since I did the grocery shopping. As you can see, the ripple effect started simply by not discussing Church spread throughout our lives. We were not on the same page on anything, especially in the last year before we changed our faith direction.
Today, we discuss everything, sometimes in way more detail than is really necessary. My role has evolved. I now see myself more as part of a married unit and less as just an individual. This does not diminish who I am. I still have my own likes and dislikes, my own preferences, my own successes and my own failings. Instead of thinking of myself first, though, I think of us. It has been a gradual shift. I recognize it more in retrospect than I do in day to day living. I am more than okay with this shift. It has brought me peace. It is an awesome feeling to know I am yoked with someone, pulling together for a common purpose, instead of having to do all of the work on my own. For that person to be Dave, after all these years, still has the ability to give me goosebumps.
In order for us to get here, we were blessed by our parish priest. He gave of his time and of himself, to help us along our path. Through him, we were given a new appreciation for the gifts God gives us through his Sacraments. This blog will give me a chance to prayerfully reflect on those gifts and how I show my appreciation for them.
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